Best Christmas Ever!

This Christmas definitely rated up there as one of the best Christmas's ever!  Why you ask?  Was it the ipad? The rings? The pumpkin roll?  Nope.  It was dishtowels.  Beautiful, lovely, hand embroidered dish towels given to me by my Grammie.

When I was a little girl my Grammie embroidered all the time.  I had pillow cases,  she had dishtowels, she made wall hangings.  I used to love to look at the rainbow of colored thread in her many boxes.  She has mentioned periodically over the years how she misses embroidering, but that her eyesight isn't what it used to be, and the small stitching is hard on her eyes.  This makes me sad.  In my heart I refuse to believe my Grammie is growing older, but in my mind I know.  I see the age spots, the slight shake of the hand, I notice that sometimes I have to speak louder than I used to and she forgets things...  She's almost 72.  She's still in amazing health for 72, she can still do ALOT.  She cares for Harri, she keeps up her house and half of ours!  She is amazing.

Back to the dish towels.  When I opened the box and saw the little lady in an embroidered orange dress...I lost it.  They were just like the ones my Grammie made herself when I was little.  Looking at them made every single happy childhood memory I had with my Grammie come flooding back.  I was so surprised and honored that she made them for me.  The sacrifice of her time, the detail that went into them that must have strained her aging eyes and hands.  I am completely and totally humbled by this gift, they are by far my favorite gift from this Christmas.

More Christmas!

It's the most wonderful time of the year.  It still doesn't feel 100% like Christmas b/c we still don't have snow, although we have plenty of cold!!  I'm SO excited for Jason and the kids to open their gifts on Christmas morning.  I worked hard to make this an awesome Christmas and I think that it will be!

Tomorrow I'm going to try my hand at....making a pumpkin roll!  I love them, and they only sell them at Thanksgiving, so I'm going to try and make one for Christmas dinner.

Not much else is going on.  I'm pretty excited for 2011. I'm still working on my goals, I'll post those next week.  They are nothing crazy though. In 2011 we are going back to Alabama to see my Amy.  Woot-woot!  We were hoping to buy a van, but we'll see... That whole VA thing may have put a wrench in that.   In 2011 I will celebrate FIFTEEN years with the man God made just for me.  We talked about a cruise, but we'll have to see how everything works out later in the year.

My Life

This is one of my favorite quotes:

We're all given terrible trials sometimes, things we think will break our spirit and kill us, and they make us stronger in the end. They seem like the cruelest blows, but in a funny way they're like compliments from God. If he didn't love you and believe in you, He wouldn't give you challenges like this. They're opportunities for Grace.


This is one of my favorite quotes ever.  Reading it and re-reading it has gotten me through me very rough times.  I would love to tell you that it was spoken by some neat person at time of terrible strife, however I got it from a Danielle Steele novel :O)

Yet again this week we were punched in the gut by VA.  I am truly starting to hate our country and their treatment of vets.  Their total disregard for the soldier/student is appalling.  They constantly F up, we have to scramble b/c of their mistake, and they have struck the Hallock's AGAIN!  It's a long story but it comes down to this.  They over paid us by $5,400 and they want their money back, like yesterday.  So, they will take our housing allowance for the next 8 months to recoup their money.  Yup, $1,000 a month less in the Hallock Family pocket due to their mistake that should have been caught during Jason's certification period.

Needless to say, I about went crazy when I heard this.  It's not like we were living high on the hog to begin with.  We have been very wise with our money to be able to get Jason through school.  I initially freaked at the thought of losing that much money per month, WTF were we gonna do??  After much talking, planning, and budgeting I think we have it figured out.  It's gonna be tight(duh!), but I'm confident we'll be okay.

Today, Jason and I went out to finish up our C-mas shopping.  So much fun.  We have almost everything!!  I have to go to Bed, Bath and Beyond this week to get 1 thing for the kids, then my grandparents and Jason's stocking and I'm done :O)  I'm so excited!!  It hasn't snowed at all, which is inhibiting my Christmas spirit.  It just doesn't FEEL like Christmas to me yet.  Hopefully the next 7 days will get me in the mood :O)

Christmas List

One of my friends put her Christmas list on her blog, and I thought it was a cute idea, so here we go..

1. Brown knee high boots
2. New wedding rings
3. A new comforter set
4. Taylor Tickets(although they are not even on sale yet!Sept. 24th BABY!)
5. Fake Bake sessions

This was HARD, I don't really WANT for anything!  That's a massive blessing.  What's on your list this year?

Christmas!

I'm so excited for Christmas this year!  We have planned and saved so everyone in our family can have a good Christmas and I'm pretty excited.  Yesterday we started our first round of Christmas treats.  I don't like to bake, but I love to do non-baking treats.  We did Puppy chow and holiday rice krispy treats yesterday.  Next weekend will be dipped pretzels and peanut butter balls.  We'll do fudge too!  It's going to be hard to keep from gaining weight, but my goal through the end of the year is to maintain.  I've gotten back to running.  This week is the last week of my trainer :O(  She has decided to stop personal training and focus on her studies and other jobs.  I don't care for any of the other trainers, so my plan is to keep it up on my own.  I know what to do now, I just really like her accountability.  I've been doing lots of interval runs on the TM.  I'll do a 10 minute mile for .10 of a mile, then a recovery walk for .05 of a mile, it's tough!  It's been giving me a 12 minute mile average, which is faster than I have been able to do on my own.  At the end of 2 miles I'm dripping sweat!  Yesterday I even up'd it to 9:30 min mile for a little bit.  It's tough, but it's a nice change.

Tough

Next semester is going to be tough.  Jason will be starting classes for his major which are conveniently all at night.  Note: Conveniently is said which sarcasm. :O)

He has 1 day class and 4 night classes. Ick.  That means no family time and no gym/running time at night.  I'm gonna have to go back to 6:30 am training sessions and running in the morning.  Thankfully the running will be at the gym in the warm, b/c it's gonna be cold out!! We will really have to learn to cherish weekends as family time.  Monday-Thursday will be Momma gets home, we eat diner, and Daddy leaves for school.  It's gonna stink.  I keep reminding Jason and myself that it's means to an end! I just hope all his classes for the next 2 years aren't at night.  That will really suck!

GOTR Part 2

I got an e-mali today stating there was a already a chapter in process for our county!  Whoo-hoo!  I really didn't want to start and head up a new one.  I am excited to volunteer and coach for this one though.  Everything should be a approved by the end of the month.  Then we will start meeting, and hopefully be able to have our first season come fall!

Girls on the Run

Through random clicking of pages that my friends have "liked"  I found Girls on the Run.  Upon entering their site and reading what they do, I was hooked.  This is their mission statement:

To educate and prepare girls for a life time of self-respect and healthy living.

It gives me chills, seriously.  It's a 12 week program that not only trains 3rd-8th grade girls to run a 5k it encourages them to make wise choices.

This is the objective:

The objective of Girls on the Run is to educate and empower girls at an early age in order to prevent the display of at-risk activities in the future. At risk activities include substance/alcohol use, eating disorders, early onset of sexual activity, sedentary lifestyle, depression, suicide attempts and confrontations with the juvenile justice system. 

This is a program after my own heart!!  I click locations...only 2 chapters in Kansas, and they are FAR away!!  :O(  What's a girl to do??  Why click the "start your own chapter" button of course!  I'm waiting for them to send me information about starting a chapter in my county.  I don't know what goes into it, I don't know anything about running a non-profit organization, but I do know I haven't been this fired up about something in a long time.    

I'm excited to find out more about the program and any way that I can get involved.

Almost back where I was

After I had Harri I lost 63 pounds.  I swore it wouldn't come back on, but it did(at least most of it)   :O(
At the beginning of this year I decided I was going to take it off, again.  Right now I'm about 8 pounds more that what my lowest was after I had H.  Who-hoo!  I'm going to keep working with the trainer, I'm going to pick my running again.  I'd like to lose 25-30 more pounds.  That'll be my focus after the first of the year.

You know what drives me insane?

1. People who bitch all the time they are broke, yet are always buying "stuff". If you have money for that "stuff" you are NOT broke! If your heat is getting turned off, that's broke. If it's getting turned off b/c you don't have money to pay it b/c of the "stuff" you bought, well, you're just plain stupid. I've been seeing this "trend" on FB a lot lately and I'm sure it's only going to get worse as Christmas grows near. We have 3 children in a 1 income household while Jason goes to school. Money is tight, times are tough, but we are making due. They can too. I'm afraid I may have to block some people. I'm not gonna wanna hear about how much their kids C-mas gifts are and how expensive they are and how they can't afford them. THEN DON'T BUY THEM!! Geez, go teach your kids the real meaning of Christmas this year then.

2. Our family learned the very hard way alcohol gets you NOWHERE. There is a girl I know that her idea of "quality time" with her husband is getting drunk. Is it just me or does that seem wrong? Don't get me wrong, I like to have a few, a few times a YEAR! Yes, my average drinking nights range 2-4 a YEAR and I'm proud of that. If I have to get drunk to enjoy my husband what does that say about our relationship? When she told me that, I just looked at her like she was a retard. I can't fathom. Maybe it's the fact that both of my parents are alcoholics...I don't know, but it's not something I do often. I don't have to drink to have fun, It's expensive, when I do drink it makes me sick, and I end up saying shit that doesn't need to be said. Gee, that sounds fun.

3. Perhaps it's the eternal optimist in me or the very high anti bullshit level, either way I can't stand whining. Your life is not that bad. That's what I want to say to all these people. Or you got yourself into this mess, so shut up. I know, compassion is not my strong point. I just don't feel bad for people who makes choices then whines about the consequences. If I can spend the extra 3 1/2 minutes to think about my decisions you can too. If I can be a grown up and realize I made the choices that put me here you can too. When I tell people this I get the, "I'm not as strong as you" crap. Let me tell you a secret. YOU ARE AS STRONG AS YOU CHOOSE TO BE. You CHOOSE not to be strong b/c it's easier, b/c you can whine more, b/c people will feel bad and help you. It's your CHOICE.

Ever had so much to say, yet you know you'll never say it?

I feel like I could verbally vomit on numerous topics. I am feeling annoyed at most aspects of my life right now. I'm so done. I seriously want to tell everyone to just "Shut the Fuck Up!"

Do you how much much better I would feel if I could do that? I already feel a little better just typing it :O)

Bragger

I totally have to brag about my kiddos. We had parent/teacher conferences this week and they are both doing amazing. Jonathan, received 4 A's and 2 B's. His teacher said he is bright, helpful, responsible and an overall great student. His only downfall? Chatting. He's a talker. 3 of his 6 teachers have commented on his "excessive" talking in class. His homeroom teacher even said that his name has come up every month for student of the month, however he has yet to receive it due to his excessive talking.

Savannah is a whiz. She is 1/4 of the way through her 3rd grade year and her standardized tests have her at the middle of 4th grade for reading, math, and language. I knew she was smart but, WOW! Her reading has really picked up this year too. She's reading 4.4-4.8 books right now. She blows through books on her own level. I've stopped buying books as much b/c she reads them to fast. Totally reminds me of myself as a child.

Harrison-I was supposed to meet with Ms. Carla for how he is doing at school, but it got rescheduled. However I assure you he is a genius too!

I'm doing something different

So far it's going well. I'm hesitant about sharing, b/c everyone has an opinion and I don't really feel like listening to them right now. Once all is said and done I may share, but that's weeks away. It's nothing bad, don't worry. In the long run I believe it's going to be a very good thing :O)

I love my birthday!

Birthdays are special. I try to make them special for those around me and I love it when others make mine special. I actually got to have a 2 day birthday this year :O) On Tuesday my office took me to lunch at Olive Garden, where I received an orange cake and a $15 itunes GC! Whoo-hoo! Then that night Jason took me to dinner and gave me my next 8 weeks of training sessions. Double Yay! After 2 doses of Alfredo in one day, I got my ass handed to me at the trainer! My legs still hurt! On my birthday morning, the kids presented me with their gifts. A running shirt, sunglasses, a super cute hat, and an orange loofah! I loved it all! I worked and went to lunch with Jason, then home for a quiet evening of hanging out and grocery shopping. I love my life. Thank you all of you who sent birthday wishes.

hmmmm...

Sometimes, I hate Facebook. It makes me feel like I have nothing to blog about when I come here, b/c most everything is already out over there. I have to really rack my brain for "new" news. Let's see...

I had a couple of rough weeks at work awhile back. The kind of days where you don't want to get up and go to work. That's never happened to be before at this job. I've always loved my job. Those few weeks though...I was half tempted to look for another position. I worked through it and talked to my boss(who is awesome) and I feel much better now. Next month I'll have been there 18 months. 18 months and no raise. Don't get me wrong I've had bonuses, but not an hourly raise. So, I will be putting on my big girl panties and asking for one. Agh! So not in my comfort zone. Running is going better. I'm back on the saddle. I feel really weird not doing the long distances that I once was, but I have to remind myself that I'm not training for a marathon anymore so 10 mile runs are no longer necessary! I set my own personal record yesterday at the Susan G. Koman 5k. Pretty excited about that one :O)

Jason is looking to change his major...again. I truly don't care as long as he's happy. I just want him to hurry up and be done. I'll be excited to live like normal people again. The kids are doing well. Jonathan is rocking the 6th grade. He has 5 A's and 2 B's. At progress report time he had 7 A's so I'm riding him hard to get those B's back up. Savannah is doing awesome academically, but it's her attitude that is causing trouble. She's always getting "yellows" for talking, and talking back. Harrison is about as perfect and wonderful as they come!! He's talking way more now and understands most everything you say to him. He's the puzzle master. He has 4 wood puzzles that he loves. He goes to "school" 2x a week for 1/2 a day and I think it's great for him to have children his size around. He's so used to playing with the big kids I often worry about how he'll do once he gets into kindergarten and has to play nice with others.

I'm super ready for fall! Cooler running temps and SOUP! I made homemade potato soup tonight. It was pretty delish. It was almost a disaster though. I only had wheat flour and I had no idea how that was going to play out... It made the soup thicker so I had to add more water and bouillon, then added more spices to compensate for the more water. It turned out pretty good if I do say so myself(and I do!)

It's amazing what antibiotics and pain meds will do for you! I feel like a new woman. I woke up at 9 still feeling crappy, took more meds and went back to bed until 1. Finally got up and around and started my Sunday ritual of laundry and cleaning. I went grocery shopping later than normal and it was nice. Everyone else was at home having dinner, so wal-mart was pretty barren. It was nice. Happy ya'll have a great week :O)

Dopey

That's how I feel. I think I have an ear infection. I have been having some sharp, almost unbearable pain in my ear. It only last 5-10 seconds at a time, thankfully, but it hurts like hell when it's here. I have some homeopathic drops I got at Wal-mart and some perkiset(sp?) that my Grammie gave me. I was surfing the net, updating blogs waiting for it to kick in and I think it has. I'm starting to feel loopy and sleepy. So I should probably stop here, and come back tomorrow to update. If I start a blog now who knows how it will end up!

Not much new,

Thought I should update though. I feel better. I had some stuff to get off my chest at work and once I did I instantly felt better. I have never been one to keep feelings inside. If I'm upset, mad, happy, ect, I'll tell you. Holding feelings in just breeds contempt and makes the person holding in the feelings miserable, while the other person has no clue!! Anyway, I had an awesome weekend. My mom, step-dad and nieces and nephews came to visit. I had never seen Zachary before, he's so little and sweet! It was fun to snuggle baby again. I put all the pics up on FB. A few even came out really good! There are a few of my sister that are amazing! I think I'm finally going to try and figure out my camera. It's silly to have a $600 camera and to use it as a point and shoot. I need to learn all the settings and stuff. I know I could do so much with it, if I just learn!

hmph..

I'm bitchy, cranky, totally blah. No reason. All is well. Kids are back in school. Jason is back in school. I'm working. Nothing has changed. I'm just BLAH. I think the blah-ness is contributing to lack of running desire, or maybe the lack of running is contributing to the blah-ness. To be honest I'm not sure which it is. All I know is I have an overall blah-ness for life. Work, home, everything in between. Blah, blah, blah blah. I don't feel like doing anything. Running, fixing dinner, doing laundry, snuggling with my children, kissing my husband, nothing. I just want to sit and be blah. Let's be honest. It's depression. At least that's what it sounds like. It will go away soon. It always does. Those few weeks that it lasts though....blah, blah, blah...

Tired and Happy

What a weekend! I am soooo very tired, but so happy we went. We left Derby at 7:30 a.m. Friday for our weekend adventure. We booked a King suite at the Drury Inn for Friday and Saturday night. If you've never stayed in one I highly recommend it! It was little pricier than some in the area but they had HOT breakfast and a 3 free drink happy hour with bar food munchies. The money we saved from not going out to breakfast was worth it! Our room was nice and we had a separate room from the kiddos, so that was even nicer. We checked in about 11 on Friday dropped off our stuff then hit the mall! Both of the kiddos had a school clothes money and it was burning a hole in their pocket. I wish I could say we went to some neat stores we don't have here, but that's not the case. The Oak Park Mall had pretty much the exact same stores our mall does. Jonathan hit the motherload at Hot Topic. They had $19 skinny jeans(on sale from $34, thank the Lord!). He got 4 pairs and a very LOUD belt. We hit up a couple of other skate stores for him and got some t's. Then went to JC Penney and Justice for Savannah. Lord, I was wondering if I was ever going to be able to find her a shirt with out Justen Beiber on it. That kid is sooooo not cute! On Friday evening we went to dinner at an awesome Italian restaurant. Unfortunately we had to bail early b/c Harri had his fill and was just crying non-stop. So Jason and I enjoyed our dinner in the hotel room. Ahhhh, the joys of parenthood!

Saturday we got up and had our hot breakfast at the hotel, it was pretty yumm-o. Then we headed to the Legends, which is an outdoor outlet mall. It was neat place with statues and fountains, and of course, shopping! I hit up the adidas store and got a new running tank, sports bra, socks, and my favorite, foam flip flops! They are the kind that are memory foam. They mold to your feet when you put them on. Soooo awesome! We also got Harri 2 new pairs of shoes at the Stride Rite store. His fat feet make him darn near impossible to buy shoes for. SR has W and XW for kids which is great and we took advantage of the buy one get one 1/2 off sale :O) For lunch we went to T-Rex. It's like Rainforest Cafe, but with a dinosaur/Jurassic theme. It was pretty neat and the kids loved it. I still prefer RC, but I'm glad we went. It was fun and the food was great. After the Legends we went to the Apple store or as my Grampy calls it...the mothership. Jason has been trying to decide between a used motorcycle or a mac. Praise the Lord he came to senses and decided on a mac(can you tell I'm not a fan of motorcycles?) We got a Mac Book Pro with iwork(like office) and a printer. They offer an education discount so we saved $100 on the computer(which is awesome b/c Apple doesn't have sales), and $30 on the iwork disc, and the printer was free, with a rebate of course. Jason got a new rockin' Hurley bag for school too. Overall an expensive trip to the apple store, but I think it will be so worth it in the end. Saturday evening we hung out at the hotel and vegged while the big kids swam.

This morning Harri woke up bright and early at 6:30! What was that boy thinking?? So he snuggled in bed with us and watched TV. I got sucked into ordering some make up from Lezza Gibbons. I'm really not a make up person, but I'd like to be. I've been spoiled by my husband telling me all the time how beautiful I am, so I don't feel the need to get all gussied up. Bad, I know. I should do it for me, but I don't really care. I'm trying to be more girly though(kinda late in life I know). So I have been buying more girly tops instead of just v-neck t-shirts(my default favorite!) and I've been trying to look for cute shoes. Something more feminine than just a pair of black flats(again, my default fave). Anyway, I digress, I didn't stay on the Bare Minerals bandwagon, so we'll see how this goes.

This morning we headed home and back to real life. The kiddos are in bed and ready for the first day of school( I think). Jason's classes start on Thursday, so he'll be home with Harri most of the week then Grammie duty will kick back in. I'm ready for school to be in session and for life to be back to normal. Oh, and I start seeing the trainer again on Tuesday! Whoo-hoo!

I'm so pissed I could scream!

Remember a few months back when I said that my dad's girlfriend called me, but my dad didn't? Guess who called me today? My dad, asking me to talk to his girlfriend!! He's left 2 messages telling me he loves me and misses me and "please talk to to Tanya.' What the fuck? WHY???? I don't know this woman and I have nothing to say!! What makes me more angry is that she called my Grammie and asked Grammie to call me and ask me to call her. Double WTF? Now my Grammie is upset with me b/c I said I didn't want to talk to her(the girlfriend). I know she only wants me to talk to her b/c it's the only time we get information on Dad. The thing is, I'm done with my parents. I only want information that he WANTS to give him. I'm not desperate enough for information to get it from his girlfriend.

I'm livid with all of them. With my father for not calling(ever!), with Tanya for thinking I have anything to say to her, and with my Grammie for making me feel bad about not wanting to talk to Tanya.

So much to blog, so little patience for typing!

Oh where to begin?? I suppose I should start with my current frustration. Jason's job. Yes, Jason has a job now. He received a call out of the blue last Monday to interview for the position of Director of Accounting for a local accounting firm. It's really flattering how it all came about. Someone from his old job(yes, the one he left a year ago) recommended him for the position. So they called, he interviewed, they offered the job, he countered their offer, he accepted. Oh, but wait! What about Harri! Who's going to care for him? That's my job to figure out in one day....Grrrrr. So Jason will be missing the last 2 weeks of his summer lit class to go to work and of course he'll only be taking his night class in the fall. No more full time student status. :O( One of my favorite quotes is this: The chief pang of most trials is not so much the actual suffering itself as our own spirit of resistance to it. I used to be very flexible and willing to change I was an Army wife and up for whatever the Army threw at us. Well, I must have had my fill, b/c I hate change now. I had a plan, a vision for our lives over the next 2 years. Now it's all different, not a bad different, just different. Well, kind of a bad different. One of the reasons I was OK with going back to work while Jason went to school was that Harri would be with my Grammie and his Daddy during the day, no daycare. I liked that. Well, my Grammie is awesome, and 71 years old. She can't really be caring for a 2 year old 10 hours a day 5 days a week. It's too much. So daycare it is :O( I THOUGHT I had found a place that would take him part time and Grammie could still keep him part time. I called them back today(after speaking with them on Friday) and the girl I spoke too was incorrect. They don't accept 2 year olds part-time. Bastards. It pretty much pissed me off and ruined my day. It looks like Harri is going to spend his time being bounced around to 2-3 different Mother's day out programs. I don't know what else to do. Most home daycare's won't take a part time child and it looks like neither will a corporate daycare. So frustrated and upset. I want to be home with my Harri...

On a happy note: Tara came to visit! We had an awesome weekend. We ran on Friday morning and went swimming Friday afternoon. Then hung out Friday night. Saturday we got up ran a 5k and then took the girls bowling and to Starbucks, while the boys golfed. It was great to just lay around and be lazy with an old friend. We played cards, watched TV(to include Veggie Tales!) and had an awesome time! I was sad to see them pull out of the driveway, but I'm super excited to see them over labor day weekend :O)

I have alot to saying about running too, but I'll post that on the other blog.

Bad day, Good month....

So today was pretty crappy. I went into work and all was well for a while, until I found out some stuff about a transaction, that now will not close. I won't bore you with the details, but it's not going to close and I don't like it when my transactions don't close. Grrr...... Then our stupid, pig headed, sexist landlord refuses to come fix our sink with out charging us. He says "women" put to much stuff down the disposal and that's why it's clogged. Then on the way home I hit a dip, and something flies off my car. OR at least clanks, and sounds like it's flying off my car. I looked back and saw a long shiny screw looking thing. I can't imagine anything on our car still being that shiny, but I also can't imagine that it was something on the road. I drive home, and later we went to Grammie's and the car is running with no problems. So let's pray it stays that way!!

Justyne and Tara are both visiting this month! I'm so excited! I haven't seen Tara since 2004 and Justyne since 2006. It's going to be so fun to spend time with friends from back in the day. I can't wait!!

20 Questions

1. On a typical day if you were not heard from, at what time would someone start to worry? Who would notice first?

Not including Jason? Josh, my boss, he'd want to know why I wasn't at work!

2. My favorite guilty pleasures are:

I don't think I have any "guilty" pleasures. Right now I don't do anything for myself but work out. However, I try very hard to make sure I do that, no matter what.

3. The one thing I want to do before I die that I haven't done yet is:

Play with my grandchildren

4. My worst vice is:

Pepsi

5. Name three things you would do with the money if you won the lottery? (PLEASE don't be pompous and say I would go to work the very next day and not do anything differently )

1. Buy land and build our dream home

2. Buy Jason a 1972 C-10 in orange and white

3. Make sure my extended family is comfortable

6. Are you living the life you always thought you would live? If not, why?

Pretty much, the life itself is what I imagined. Just minor details that I didn't

7. What food(s) do you just HATE?

Nothing I can think of, I like all foods

8. Who's life would you like to experience for a day? (again, please no pompous "no one, I only want to be me" stuff. )

Could I make changes in their life while I'm them....LOL :O)

9. What material item is on the top of your wish list right now? (a wish list means you can *want* anything, no matter how expensive or selfish )

A new car

10 Favorite candy:

3 musketeers and twix

11. One thing that you would never guess about me is:

I have a secret fear of falling on ice and busting out my front teeth

12. I wouldn't be caught dead ________?

in a bikini

13. My favorite color is:

Orange, and if you didn't know that, don't ever return to this blog :O)

14. What was your favorite childhood memory?

Getting the She-ra fountain/castle thing when I was in 2nd grade


15. Your best body part:

My eyes

16. Dream job:

Counselor(only after stay at home mom and wife, that'll always be my #1 choice)

17.What is the bravest thing you have ever done?

Listened to God and followed his direction when I didn't really want to, but I'm so glad I did :O)

18. Favorite movie:

Grease, Grease 2, Forest Gump, Shawshank Redemption


19. Give yourself a compliment:

I'm pretty awesome. I'm a loyal friend and wife, a great listener, I give good advice, I am able to look at things from different points of view and still remain true to myself. I am fun to be around, I love God and know that he can work miracles and I'm a kick as runner too!!

20. Something you love that other people probably don't know about...... a food, music group, TV show, vacation spot, clothing line, cleaning tip ANYTHING that you think is worth sharing that others most likely have never heard of.

I honestly don't know. I'm a pretty open book, and share lot... Hmmm....I LOVE quotes, reading quotes, sharing quotes, finding quotes that apply to my or a situation. A great can can get you through a bad spot.

Seriously, so busy...

Jason and my grandmother have both mentioned the last few days that I haven't seemed myself. I feel great, I feel blessed and happy with all that God has given me. The only thing I can figure...I'm exhausted. Straight up tired, all the time. I don't sleep enough. Athletes(sounds so bizarre calling myself that!) require no less than 8 hours per night. I rarely ever get that. According to my runners mag, it should a non negotiable subject. Sleep at least 8 hours. That's when your body recovers. Lord knows I need recovery, but I'm lucky to get in 7 hours. Between getting up to run, work, baseball, softball, trainer, house work, running around, yoga, I feel like I don't have time to do anything! Tuesday is Savannah's last game. I'm so thankful for this! Tuesdays and Thursdays are a beating. Up at 6, run to the gym, trainer from 6:30-7, Home to shower and get everyone ready, out the door at 8:15. Work from 9-5, Home at 5:30, load up the car, game at 6, game at 7:30, home at 9. Drop dead. Notice there's no dinner in there? Normally it's drive thru or nothing. Then at 9 everybody is sweaty, tired, and cranky from being at the ball fields. By the time all the showers have been taken, dinner has been eaten, and everyone is in bed it's 10:30. Then I'm back up at 4;45 the next morning to run.

I'm not complaining, I love my life. I'm just stating facts. We are busy. Multiple kids, in multiple activities, make for one tired mama. Then when the mama decides to have multiple activities too, well then it becomes a whirl wind! I'm not giving up my stuff though. I see to many woman sacrifice for their husbands and children. Which isn't always a bad thing, but some people take it to extreme. You don't have to give up everything for your family. Let's me honest here, would they give up everything for you? Probably not. So, I'm keeping my busy schedule. I'm just gonna do my best to slip in more sleep.

Wheew!

It's been awhile. I apologize for that. We've been busy. Nothing crazy, the normal stuff. Games on Tuesday and Thursday, class on Monday and Wednesday. I, of course, work full time. Add in there my workout schedule(I'll put that on the other blog) and we are go, go, go!!

I haven't spoken to my mother since the happening on the last post. She called later that day has probably called 7 times since then. I'm just not ready for it. I don't want to be ugly, and I'm still angry enough to let my tongue get the best of me. So I don't answer. I will have to speak to her soon since my sister is due to give birth in the next 2 weeks.

Hmmm, not much else. I've had a lifetime of excitement and I'm super grateful for the boring life we lead. I love the craziness of kids, games, work, class, and everything else that we do. I'll try to find more to blog about soon, but you can read my 500 other blogs tonight to get more info. I'm going to try and update them all!

Alcohol

I first want to post a disclaimer. The following blog is my opinion. Everyone has different opinions. I'm not posting this to pick on anyone(except my parents) if something happens to apply to you, I'm not posting about it on purpose or calling you out. This blog is about me, my parents and how their alcoholism has and continues to effect my life.

I don't drink. Not to say I never did, everyone has their wild and crazy days. Honestly, mine were before I was even able to drink legally. Now at the ripe old age of 31, I drink on very rare occasions. I truly feel it adds nothing to my life. I don't feel better, happier, friendlier, or more content, when I drink. I certainly don't drink after a bad day, hard day, long day. I've come to realize that having a beer(or any alcoholic beverage) after a bad day on a consistent basis is alcoholism waiting to happen. People tend to make the worst choices of their lives while under the influence, so what's the draw again??

Both of my parents are alcoholics. This is another reason why I don't touch the stuff. You can tell yourself that the choices you make now won't or don't effect your children, but it's a lie. My parents both think that they are good parents, my parents both think that their drinking doesn't effect anyone else. It's bullshit. My children hardly know who my father is b/c he's never around. He's currently shacked up with some woman in a town 45 minutes from us. He's lived there for over 2 years. I've seen him 3 times. For awhile we didn't know if he was still there or not b/c his phone was disconnected. Then about 2 weeks ago his GIRLFRIEND called my grandmother, and later me. No, my dad didn't call us, his girlfriend did. Talking some BS about he loves us, and cares for us. I called bullshit. I told her if really loved me he'd be calling me himself. Then I got "Oh, but you don't understand" spiel. Whatever. I understand alcohol is more important to him than his daughter and grandchildren. She tried to tell me he talks about us all the time. HA! She shut up when I said, what can he possibly say? He doesn't know us...He's only seen my son Harrison once. He hasn't been around in years. There's nothing to talk about. That was pretty much how we ended it and she hasn't called back, and of course neither has he.

My mother, now she hasn't been an alcoholic my whole life like my dad has. Her drinking didn't start until I was middle teens and never home. So honestly, I didn't notice. I was 18, married and living in a different town before I realized how bad it was. Before my Grannie died, she told she thought that she drank so much b/c it was her coping mechanism for guilt b/c her second husband abused her. I know he did, I was there, and I can even concede that the drinking for awhile afterwords may have been coping drinking. In the first few years after she started drinking heavily she got 2(that I know of DUI's). DUI's that had mandatory counseling involved. Counseling that had she been honest at, could have helped her with these "issues", but she wasn't, so they didn't and look where we are now. Where is that you ask? It's a place where your grandchildren don't want to be around you b/c you smell so bad of beer and cigarettes. It's a place where your grandchildren and children don't want to come to your house b/c you don't clean it b/c your to drunk or too busy getting drunk. It's a place where your children shudder at inviting you to the same place their friends are b/c we never know how you are going to behave when you arrive. Which brings us to today. Misty and I spent the last month planning Ashyra's 5th birthday party. In the beginning stages we contemplated the guest list. Do we want to invite Ashyra's friends from school if we are going to be inviting Mom? We decided that Ashyra would be happier with her Me-ma there(she's still too young to completely grasp the whole situation). So basically we were having a party for only family. Well, on Friday our little sister says she not coming(3rd pregnancy in 3 years), she's not feeling well. However, mom is supposed to pick up her 2 oldest children and bring them. This plan is firmed up on Friday night. Then at 9:15 this morning Misty receives a call from Tiffany who is upset b/c mom says she's not picking up her children to come to the party. Her 4 year old is upset b/c she was excited to come to the party, Tiffany's upset b/c she doesn't understand why mom isn't picking up her children. Misty calls me, I call mom. Turns out mom isn't picking up Tiff's children b/c she isn't coming to the party. She says it's b/c she doesn't have the money. Once again, I call bullshit. Let me tell you why. You know several days before an event if you are going to have the money. If she didn't have the money Saturday at 9 a.m., then she didn't have the money Friday at 5 and should have called then. If she didn't have the money, then why did she tell Elizabeth she'd pick her up this morning? No, she had the money. She was just to hungover. She didn't want to get out of bed early enough to be on the road by 10. She's lazy and selfish. I could tell by the way she was talking to me money wasn't the issue. She wasn't at apologetic, she was just a bitch. So I said, "Maybe if you didn't spend so much money on beer, you could afford to come to your granddaughters birthday party" Then I hung up. I'm done. I'm done with investing my time and my life into relationships where I get no return.

Both my parents know they drink to much and neither of them care. They are to selfish, to wrapped up in themselves to really give a damn about other people. I love them and I always will, however I choose not to to let that toxic behavior into my life anymore.

Accountability

I don't have time to blog right now, but here's a few topics I wanted to get down before I forget:

My Parent's Alcoholism
Jason's Egg Donor
Good people do bad things

Look for those exciting blogs in the near future!!

Just for Tara :O)

Now let's see if I can remember all the stuff she asked for....

Harrison's blog, I'll try to get to it tonight...Definitely this week! I promise!

Scrapping- I haven't scrapped in forever. I did like 3 pages a few months ago, but I ended up packing my stuff away and putting in the storage shed. I just didn't have the time.

I don't have any descent before and afters. I've only lost 17lbs., I'm definitely trimmer. Clothes fit better and I can run 4 miles when I couldn't do that in January! I have a LONG way to go though...about 55 lbs and 22 miles. Here's the best(or worst) before I could find. I HATE this picture!

This is me this morning before Church, so it's super recent!

KC- We had fun. It was a whirlwind! Jason picked me up at 3:30, we drove to Kansas City, ate dinner, saw Chelsea, and drove home. It was a fast 11 hours! Chelsea makes me blush on TV, so you can imagine how filthy her live show was. It was pretty bad, not all of it, but some parts made me VERY uncomfortable. On the way home Jason and I played memory ABC. We took turns coming up with a memory for every letter of the alphabet. It was fun to talk about old memories and what each of us remembered.

You already know everything...

Since I keep my blog so private, and I spend so much time on FB my whopping 5 readers are my friends and already know most everything going on in my life. I'm gonna try and find something to post about to tomorrow. Anyone have any ideas? Any questions? You need answered? Any deatils or follow ups I've slacked on?

Disappointed

Today is a sad day. It's the first time I have been truly disappointed in one my children.

Jonathan cheated on a test.

When I found out I wanted to cry and throw up. I was(and still am) mortified. He is has not met his AR goal for the month. There is a school field trip to the zoo on Friday and he needed AR points to be able to go. So somehow his "friend" took a test on a 12 point book, and then Jonathan followed suite. He took the test, and got a 100%. The sad part is that I was SO proud of him. We get the e-mails at home, and Jason forwarded me the confirmation e-mail from his test showing he received a 100%. Then to get a note sent home about the cheating...it was awful.

Needles to say, he laid in his bed in the fetal position for awful. Then it was time for consequences. Lots of them. He's completely, and totally grounded until the end of school. No phone, no DRC, extra chores, basically he's my slave for the next 17 days.

Taylor

I suppose it's about time I talked about Taylor. This was the BEST concert I have ever been to. It wasn't just a concert. It was a show. Costumes changes, set changes, all the things that you need to stay entertained for 2 hours and feel satisfied with the money you spent on the tickets!

Taylo singing Love Story

Love the dress! Totally dressed the part!

Taylor loves sundresses and cowboy boots

Singing Picture to Burn

Savannah was so overwhelmed she started crying!

She had sets for almost every song. This is Tear Drops on my guitar

Check out the set for You Belong with me :O) Pretty Sweet!

And my personal favorite:
"Shoulda said said No"
She ended the show just like her ACM performance from a few years back
The rain with the word NO in it, and she got in there and sang
It was awesome!

Love her so much!

You're off the hook, if you wanna be!

I'm transitioning my running babble to new blog. That way if you WANT to read it you can, you don't want to you don't have to. The new blog is:

http://pavement-princess.blogspot.com

This is where I where chronicle all my running woes and wins. So this should go back to being a regular 'ol blog!! I hope!!

My personal best

I did my personal best at my 5k this morning!! Whoo-hoo! I ran the 5k in 43 mins which is a 13 minute 50 second mile pace. My previous best? 14:30. I'm so excited! More blogging later. Happy Sunday Friends. Don't forget to praise the Good Lord above!!

My 3rd 5k

And I haven't run(more than a mile and a half) since my 5k last week. I'm going to be HURTING tomorrow morning! Wish me luck!!

I'm BBBBBBAAAACCCCCKKKKK!

I guess I just needed to whine and get it out of system.

Today I feel GREAT!!

I met my first weight loss goal(and then some!)

I'm in the office alone, got my orange ipod on and I'm jamming to my Tay-Tay. Love that girl

I'm going running tonight

Doing another 5k Sunday

L~O~V~I~N' the good life I lead :O)

Blah, blah, blah

I'm feeling super funky. No rhyme or reason. Just plum funky. I think work is part of it. I'm super stressed and super busy. Then shit keeps popping into my head. No reason for it. Just pop..pop..pop... I must it admit sometimes i hunt it down. It's hard to stay away though. I must challenge myself to stay away. Hunting it down does NO good. No good I say. It's been frustrating me lately though. Hence the popping into my head and the funky mood. I'd like to run it off, but I don't even feel like running. It's been 2 days since I ran and 4 days since my last long run. I'm going to be hating life after my next 3 miler.

I'm super frustrated with VA too. Seriously, could they please stop fucking with our money?? Oh, and feel free to answer a fucking phone every now and then. I'm ready for Jason to quit school and go back to work. This shit is ridiculous. It really is.

Harrison has turned into a full fledged BRAT. He was totally bullying the kids in the waiting room yesterday. He pushed a girl off a chair and pushed down a boy who was in his way. Good Times I say(very sarcastically) He hits, screams, throws food and is just plain rotten. I swatted him on his bottom last night....and he laughed at me. Ya, he went to bed at 7:03 p.m. I wasn't up for that crap.

I can almost read your mind right now, " oh God, what's wrong with Angel, this is so unlike her". I'm fine. I truly am. Just a TAD on the stressed and frustrated side. Honestly, I even thought about having a drink. I SO don't believe in drinking to make yourself feel better though. That's how alcoholism starts, and since my parents are 2 of the biggest drunks I know. I tend to stay away from the stuff most of the time.

Okay, enough crappy Angel. I think I'm going to go to bed early so I can get up and run in the morning. I have .6 to my goal and it's being very stubborn about coming off, so an extra long run oughta do it.

I think I'm getting old

When I'm away from my computer, or at work I think of all these fantastic blogs, and things I want to blog about. When I sit down to do it, I draw a blank.

This week I learned a very important lesson. You have to eat. I had been eating about 1200 calories a day and running 3-4 times a week, yet I was only losing about 1/2 a pound a week and I was getting FRUSTRATED! My plan/goal I had is shot to shit b/c I lost 10-12 lbs the first month and like 2-3 the second. WTF is going on?? I was getting very discouraged. So after a little internet research I discovered I was eating 500 calories less then my body mandated minimum. In layman's terms? I was starving myself. I didn't feel like I was starving, but my body did. Therefore it was latching on it everything I ate. The calories you need are based on your current weight, as you lose weight your caloric need will decrease. I was way under what I needed for survival and the running wasn't helping. Since I have adjusted my calories and kept up the running I've lost a pound. Whoo-hoo! It's not a lot, but it tells me I was doing wrong and now my body is rewarding me for doing right. So hopefully I will start dropping the pounds again. I'm going to have to reevaluate my goals and time line. There is no way I can lose 20 lbs in a month, at least not safely! So I'm going to change my next goal date from June 1st to June 19th. I know it seems like an odd day, but if everything goes as planned that will be the day I run my 1st 8k.

In an effort to help me meet this goal I will be adding strength training to my regimen. Gasp! I HATE strength training. I have the P90X videos. I have only done them once. They represent the 2 things I hate most about exercising, exercising at home and strength training. I know that if I do them they will kick my ass. I truly have to get over that major hurdle of working out at home. I would much rather go to the gym. The problem there is I would only do the machines, which are better than nothing, but not the best way to strength train. So for the sake of my hott(yes I did 2 t's on purpose) bod. I must do the P90X.

I am still trying to decide how to do my runs. I want to start shaving time off. I will still do my distance runs, but I think I will alternate that with short(1 mile) runs for speed only. Today Jason and I did a 1 mile run(with hills! Arg!) in 12:56. Not to shabby. I know I could do it faster if it was a flat run. If I learned anything from yesterday, it's that I can't just run on a flat surface. It's important to change it up. So I'm trying, but it's HARD!

I'm sorry if ya'll are getting bored with nothing but running talk. It's what's going on with me and what is super important to me right now. I will however try to give you a quick run(hahaha) down on the rest of the family since they haven't been mentioned much.

Jason-He is almost done with the semester he's kicking butt in everything but Econ. He'll still pull a B- or C+ in the course. He was hoping for better, but the tests(he says) are the hardest tests he's ever taken. He has already registered for his summer classes. However if he can get into college algebra this summer, they will change a little. Pray he does well on his placement and can get into the summer class. If he doesn't it will add an extra semester to his college career, and we don't want that!!

Jonathan-Is about to be a middle schooler! Next year he will be at the 6th grade center. I'm SOOOO not ready for that. He's a good boy. He does what he's asked, and doesn't lip back much at all. He finished level 4(of 5) swim lessons last week. He's active in "Earth Savers" at school. It's pretty much how it sounds. They do recycling and do things to be more "green". He wants to do it again next year too. As a reward for all their hard work, the club got to go to the zoo on Earth Day. He came home with all sorts of free goodies, and had a great time despite the pouring rain that came down on them!!

Savannah-Is doing much better. I'm still sure she will be the death of me, but my death has been delayed slightly. She's a very needy girl. She needs lots of attention and requires lots of patience. It's hard, very hard. She loves to lay on me and sit on me, and when I try to explain that she's to old/big for that she about melts down. She wants to be 16, but still be 3. It's so annoying and frustrating. It's a daily struggle to be patient and choose my battles.

Harrison- OMG, I love that boy! He is so wonderful. He's getting to the terrible 2's and is becoming more independent. Oh my he's smart. Grammie works with him everyday. He's started to speak in 2-3 word sentences and of course knows what your asking and can respond. He wants to sit at the table very badly. He loves to be a big boy. He "wrestles" with Jason and Jonathan and thinks that is the greatest thing ever.

There's the low down on the family. They are all still alive and kicking :O) Even if I haven't been talking about them much!

22 seconds

It seems like not that much time right? Well, in running it's a LIFETIME!! It was the time that I added to my 5k. I'm so disappointed in myself. I started out strong, but the last half was through a golf course. You know what that means? HILLS, and they killed me. I was SOOOO upset with my time. I'm doing my next 5k on May 22. I WILL be shaving at least 3 minutes off my time. I'm going to start running shorter distances for time. I love the distance running, but I've got to step up the runs for speed to. Then I have to kick up the distance too, b/c in June I'm doing an 8K :O)

I think I'm gonna have to re-evaluate my run schedule. My body is NOT ok with everyday runs. At least 3 mile everyday runs. So I think I'm going to do 3 miles every other day. I would rather do less and stay healthy(no injuries)rather than push it, hurt myself and not be able to run for weeks(or worse).

The kids finished swim lessons tonight. Thank God! That will help cut down our running around schedule. It's just to much sometimes. The summer should be pretty slow. Jason is taking 2 classes, the kids will be going to day camp to the Rec center and Harrison will be hanging out with his GG :O) I'm ready for LAZY days! Well, as lazy as they can be!

Work has been insanely crazy busy. 90 hours on this paycheck. Wish I could have had it all. Stupid VA. I'm so sick of them jacking with our benefits. I'm SOOOO thankful that Jason didn't stay in and get injured or worse. If this is the way they treat us, I can only fathom the horrible treatment the disabled vets get. It's amazing how much they jack with our pay, don't answer the phones, or just plain don't know what the HELL is going on!

Hmmmm....

So what do you wanna know?

I only ran twice this this week :O( I will never take 3 days off between runs again! That second run hurt!! My goal is to run 15 miles PER WEEK! Kinda sounds like a lot, but it's only 3 miles a day 5 days a week. Which is totally doable. IF I HAVE TIME! So, I'm going to get up in the AM and go running. That way I can do P90X at night. I need to add strength training to my work out. My cardio and reduced calories are not getting me where I want to me as fast as I want to get there. I have 21 lbs to lose by June 1 for my first goal. Then another 36 lbs by Oct. 13 for goal #2. So 58 lbs more to lose, and I've already lost 14. Agh. I know the slower it comes of the more likely it is to stay off, at least that's what I what I tell myself to keep going :O)

What else?

We went to see a HORRIBLE play last night. I'll be so glad when Jason is out of theater class. I also found out last night that Jason's mother is FB friends with the MOST awful, horrible person in the world! Ya, you know the one. She's SO awful. What kind of mother is she? A Terrible one, for sure! It bothers me more than Jason. He wrote her off a long time ago!! She's sick in the head.

Hmmmm.... I wish I had more for you. But right now I don't :O( Work and running. That sums me up right now. What's up with you??

Totally Addicted

I love it. I love running. I love how my body feels after a run. I love the feeling of satisfaction that comes with the completion of a run.

My first 5K!!

Nothing feels as good as accomplishing a goal!! Especially a goal that once seemed completely and totally unattainable. I started the Couch to 5K program on January 18th. It took me slightly longer than the slated 9 weeks to finish the program. I'm OK with that, the end result is the same. I completed a 5k! I never would have believed in January I'd actually be running a 5k. It's truly an amazing feeling

This is my bib :O) Jason had to tell me what the F31 was for(Female, 31 yrs)

Jen and I before our run. I'm proud to say I wasn't near as nervous as I thought I'd be.

And about an hour later, after our run. I like this picture better b/c we have color in cheeks :O)

We finished 85 and 86 out of 106 people. Not bad at all

Our official end times were 44:36.7 and 44:35.9
Which mean we ran a 14 minute 30 second mile.
Very pleased with that.

I accomplished my 2 main goals which were to FINISH and RUN the entire race. I also had 2 minor goals that I didn't share b/c I was afraid I was going to put to much pressure on my myself for my first race. Those 2 goals were to NOT be last & to finish in under 45 minutes. I accomplished both of those as well! So happy.

Tomorrow Jason and I are starting P90X. It's a crazy intense strength training work out that is supposed to take you from flab to fab 90 days. We'll see.... I'll be honest and say I DO NOT want to do it. Jason wants to do it and me being the supportive, loving wife that I am have agreed to torture myself as well! So I will be doing that 3 days a week, running 2-3 miles 3 days a week, AND doing side runs with Savannah. Why side runs with Savannah? Jason and I have decided we want to do a 5k as a family. Savannah asked me to train her(thank God for children who think their parents are great at everything!!) All of that activity should keep me plenty active and get me to my goal weight by June 1st and hopefully my 2nd goal weight by Oct 13th.

I bet you're on the edge of your seats....

waiting for an update of my oh, so glorious life!

I've been BUSY! I don't quite remember last week. Everyday at work was non-stop. Throw in a sick baby, and a date with a mega star and WOW, what a week! I will do a post dedicated to Taylor sometime this week, b/c she deserves her own post. She is awesomer than awesome. I heart her more now, then I did last week, and I never would have that thought possible!

My life pretty much revolves around my running. I love it. I can't believe that I'm 50 lbs overweight and running 2-2.5 miles on a consistent basis. Me and my 14 minute mile kick ass! My first 5k is this weekend. I haven't actually ran 3.2 miles yet. 2.49 is my max so far, I would like to get up to 3 miles before Wednesday, since I won't run Thursday or Friday. We'll see. I only have 2 goals for this race:

1. Finish it
2.Run it all

I don't care if I'm dead last, if I run it and I finish it, I'll be happy as a clam!!

Next month is a 2mile and a 10k here in Wichita. No, I'm not doing a 10k..yet! I'm going to train to start shaving minutes off my time. I'm thinking 2miles in 25 minutes...something like that.

Work has been so incredibility busy! This first time home buyers and move up tax credit has home buyers coming out of the wood work! We have people selling, then buying with the upgrade. It's GREAT for business, but Lordy I stay busy!!! In May I'm going to Real Estate school. I'm constantly writing contracts, negotiating contracts, writing amendments, negotiating repairs, all sorts of things I'm technically not supposed to do, soon I will be official though! I'll be able to sell on the side, and pick up the over flow from our uber busy office and make money a little extra money too! I truly love what I do. I really like Real Estate. I love the people I work with and for. They are like family. I'm sooooo blessed to have the awesome job that I do.

They were right...

All those people who said running outside was better than running on a treadmill...they were so right!! I figured it probably would be, but I was never confidant enough to try. Plus, I could only run 3 mins at a time. What's the point of doing that outside?? But now...now I can run. Albeit it's a slow run, I average 4.2-4.6 miles per hour. Which I understand is a brisk walk to some, but to me it's a steady paced jog, and I love it.

I did 2 miles around my neighborhood today. I found an app on my phone that is supposed to measure for me, but apparently I need to work out the kinks. I about chucked my phone into the ground when it said I had only ran .82 miles!! I made Jason go drive it with me and it was exactly 2 miles, not sure what the hell was wrong with the phone!! I sprinted the last block to my house at the end, and truly thought I was going to puke when I arrived on my porch. I didn't though :O) My first 5k is in just a little less than 2 weeks. I can't believe it's almost here and I more than that I can't believe I'm almost ready for it. I may be slow, but I am very confident I will be able to run the whole thing!!

Oh Crappy Day....

What an awful day today was. I woke up to go running after a restless night of sleep. I didn't really want to go, so I pumped myself up. I got up, got dressed, and by the time I got to the park I had convinced myself that I was ready to do a solid mile and a half.

All that came to a screatching halt when I arrived at the gate and saw: PARK CLOSED

What a let down. I could have ran the neighborhood, or went to the gym, but I wanted to run the park and none of the other options appealed to me. So a I came back home and crawled back into bed next to Jason.

Work is so busy. I'm still catching up from vacation. I love that we are busy and we have lots going on, but dang, can a girl catch break.

So between no running, and work, and whatever else I'm just cranky. Cranky and down in the dumps.

Jason just got home early....I think I'm gonna go run.

Sorry!

I just want to say sorry in advance for all the photos you're going to have to endure while I learn my new camera. This is my favorite from today. No, she's not wearing make-up.

Where do I even begin??

We had an AWESOME visit with Amy and her family. The weather was awful most of the week, but we made the most it. On Sunday we had family pictures done, then went downtown and walked around. Benji and Jason took 3 of the 6 to a hockey game, while Amy and I came home and got "makeovers" by Gracie and Savannah. Monday, the guys went golfing while the ladies took the kiddos roller skating. Tuesday was Amy's birthday and zoo! The Zoo was amazing like always, but OMG it was COLD!! After the zoo we met up my my sister at Granite City for Amy's birthday dinner. Wednesday, Katie and Jonathan went roller skating while the rest of us went to "The Keeper of the Plains" Very cool. I hadn't been since I was a kid, and it was much neater than I remember it being. Wednesday afternoon Amy and I got some girl time and headed off to get pedicures. Thursday they left :O(. We didn't do much but try and get Amy's phone fixed(she dropped while she was here). They rolled out about 3:30 and made it back to 'Bama around 4 in the morning. It was a awesome visit. We had so much fun. I hated to see them go.

I did get to take lots of pictures with my new camera though!! With our tax return I splurged and got a Canon Rebel Xsi. LOVE it! I'd have rather gotten a Nikon, but I don't have any one to teach me the ins and outs of one. There is a girl I'm friends with on FB, that is an up and coming photographer who is willing to share her knowledge and since she has a canon I figured I'd get the same. It came with a 18-55mm lens, but I want to get a 50mm when we get the money. Right now all the photos are being taken on auto, but I'm going to start learning this week. It's silly to pay that much for a camera and only use the auto function. I think I may even sign up for classes somewhere. All the pictures from the Wood's visit were taken with my new camera and they are all on FB if you want to check them out.

Monday it's back on the running horse. I'm scared I won't be ready for my 5k. I'm gonna really have to step it up a notch over the next 3 weeks. I haven't ran since last Wednesday. So Monday I'm starting C25k week 6 over. I also think I will run 5 days a week, if I can. I'm so not a morning person!!! Thankfully, I didn't deviate from my eating to badly over SB and I only gained .4 of a pound. Whoo-hoo!

My favorite pics from yesterday...

I LOVE my new camera!!

Olivia Grace

Harri at the antique store

Savannah Grace

Katie Elizabeth

Harrison and his Mim

We had a great day!!

Waiting...

The Woods are in Kansas! Just not at my house...yet! They will be in an hour though. Whoo-hoo!

So excited!

Amy and her family will be here in 6 days!! I'm so stinkin' excited I can hardly stand it. I'm like a kid waiting for Christmas. I'm so ready for a break from work and everything else and just spend time hanging with my friend and her family. We will celebrate her birthday while she's here, I have a cool surprise planned for that! We will also go to the zoo and the drive in. She's going to make Jonathan a skateboard cake while she's here. I think most of you became a fan of her FB page, and know what awesome cakes she makes. When we were in Alabama last summer she made a cake for Savannah, and now it's Jonathan turn. He is so excited!

Here lately I have been in a great mood! I'm working out, the sun has been out, and I have in general been feeling great. I finished week 5 of my Couch to 5k program and ran 18 minutes yesterday!! What a step up from when I could barley run 90 seconds!! I was supposed to run 20 minutes, but whoever thought going from a 8 minutes run to a 20 minute run was a good idea was crazy!! I went 13 minutes than had to walk for a couple of minutes, then finished strong. Tomorrow is week 6! I can't wait to get started!!! Jen and I are doing our 5k in just over a month. So excited and scared at the same time. I've never committed myself to anything like that before. I can't wait. I don't care what my time is, I just want to finish!!

What a week!

This week was a little bit on the CRAZY side. Last week we had 2 of our agents quit, so this we was super busy making sure someone was covering our leads. Not to mention we had 5 contracts come in! Two of them ending up not coming to terms and one of them I negotiated myself! Start to finish :O) YaY me! By mid week we had a replacement for 1 of the girls, and we have another agent starting class on Monday. I hope with these people we will be able to get to our goal of 25 million, b/c if we do I get a company car! Whoo-hoo Me!

The big kids are still doing swim lessons on Tuesday and Thursday. So those days are crazy, not to mention Jason also has class on Thursday, and I keep E and A those nights. I feel like I'm constantly running. No rest for the weary, right? I need to get up and do my running in the mornings. Doing it at night seems to disrupt my sleep patterns.

Yesterday the car started acting up and by last night it wouldn't start at all. This morning Jason and Grampy took it to Sears and sure enough it was the starter. He also said their is a belt going bad, but that's a problem for another day!

In good news, Jason did his FASFA stuff and we qualify for max pell grant next year which means less loans!! Yeah! We will need it since VA decided we have to pay back the $3,000 advance out of pocket. Initially they had said they would take it off the back end of the benefits. Somebody somewhere decided that wasn't good enough and they thought they should take it back in increments of $750 per month! WTH? We only get $1,000 per month in benefits! Jason told them flat out if they did that he would have to quit school and he would call his congressman(I still think he should do this). So they "worked" with him(aren't they gracious?) and they are going to take $250 a month from our benefits until it's paid off. What a crock. It can never be smooth with the government.

Speaking of, we are still waiting on our taxes. damn injured spouse form. We have no idea what they are paying to DFAS, if they are going to pay them off, or what. Hopefully it will come soon. My dryer is about to die!!

I'm becoming very...Eh, about my blog. I'm not going to delete it or anything crazy like that. I just feel I don't have much to say anymore. My life is so mundane that who wants to hear about it. And, I'm so personal, and don't want just anyone reading it, so I don't advertise. So, what's the point? I'm fairly honest and straightforward on here and I just don't like everybody in my business. I'm going to "revise" my FB friend list too. I deny ALOT of people, but some I accept then block them from my news feed b/c I really don't care. I'm not trying to be mean, but just b/c we were friends in HS or grade school does not mean I want you in my business now. I have over 100 friends on FB and only interact with 20-25 at the very most. Some people I have approved, and they've never even said anything to me! Losers! They only want to be nosey. There just are not that many people I care about or mean enough to me to be involved in my life now. I'm past the "I'm everyone's friend" stage and have moved on to having my own "circle of trust". More than likely I will never see most of those people, so they are getting the boot! In case you are worried, don't be. If you read this blog your safe on FB!

Couch to 5k

I LOVE this program! I really like to run, but it's been years(a lot of years) since I have been able to do it with ease and distance. When I was trying to find something to get me back in the swing of things I found this program. It seemed almost to good to be true. Couch to 5k in 9 weeks?? Are they serious? Don't they know how out of shape I am?? I am now a believer. I ran 5 minutes straight tonight, and while I was ready to stop when my time was up, I'm sure I could have keep going if I had to. Actually I know I could have if I had to. Over on the right is a countdown to my first 5k. My friend Jen and I are doing it together and I'm stoked!! A 5k! That might as well be a million miles to me. It's going to take training and dedication but I know I can do it. I want this to be 'my thing'. I can't wait to say, "I'm a runner' or 'Ya, I like to run' or 'Oh, I can't, I'm doing a 5k this weekend'!! Hehehehe, good night all~!

If you don't have anything nice to blog about don't blog at all.

The Dark Ages

It's that time again. The time of year I hate. I really used to love Spring. Now I dread it. The months of February-April are my own personal Dark ages. Every year I say they won't be, but they are. I can't help it. I try to not to think about it. Yet years later,here I am thinking about it. Thinking about the days. Counting the days. I'm sick, like nauseous, when I think about making it through these months. This year is really dragging me down. I think it's because there is no sun. Grey everyday. It makes me so tired, I only want to sleep. I want the damn sun! I NEED the damn sun! What's in the forecast? More fucking snow! It's not helping my disposition at all. Jason is on me all the time about being 'to quite'. Can you imagine? Angel Hallock, to quite. The weird part is I'm not thinking about anything. I'm quite with no thoughts. Nothing running through my head except for, "When can I sleep next?" No deep thoughts, no planning for the future, or thoughts of the past. Nothing. Just sleep, I only want to sleep. I felt great for the few hours yesterday the sun was out. No sun today :O( C'mon May hurry up and get here!!

I'm a Crank Ass!

We have a seller that has finally gotten under my skin. He's been nothing but a rude, unhappy, ungrateful, asshole since we put his house under contract. Yesterday he spent 30 minutes cussing at me and telling me what a horrible job Josh has done as his realtor. Today, he started in again bitching about everything. He's a loser who's pissed off at the whole world and I'm so thankful his house closes tomorrow. Im' taking a half day and I know that shit is going to hit the fan about 7 times before all is said and done. I don't care. 99% of the time I love my job, but some times I just don't get paid enough to deal with sellers shit.

I can't believe I'm even thinking about it!!!

For for the past few weeks I have been working out with Tiffany, Josh's wife. There is a woman's ministry workout class on Tuesday and Thursday mornings. It's hard, it kicks my ass. Last October Tiffany did a 26.2 mile marathon for the Leukemia and Lymphoma society. Today she called me and told me she wants me to do it with her this year! What?? I'm up to 90 seconds running non stop, that's a LONG way from 26.2 miles! Even if I walked some, hell, even if I walked it all, that's an insane amount of miles!! What's even more insane is that I'm thinking about it!! I'm actually thinking about it and even a little excited about it! I love to run, I'm loving the the Couch to 5k program. Twenty-six miles though??? I just don't know. I'm scared, excited, intimidated....