My sister announced today on myspace that she is bi sexual. I expressed that I thought it was a cowardly way to tell me. That I was hurt by her not telling me in person. That I thought she should have given more thought to her girls before doing this. Guess what? I am the bad guy.
Her friends are bashing me left and right for not supporting her. Saying I am really pissed b/c she is bi. Saying I don't know what unconditional love is. And you know what hurts the most? Misty is letting them. After all the times I have stood up for her, she is letting them beat me down like I have down something wrong by having my feelings hurt.
I didn't say one word either way about the bi thing. I said I was hurt by finding out that way. That she should be with a girl for more than a week before telling her daughter. I am not a "Yes Man", nor will I ever be. Just b/c I don't jump for joy and say, You go Girl, all the sudden I don't love her? B/c I think of the other elements of this announcement I don't know what unconditional love is?
I am the ONLY person in my sister's life who has loved her unconditionally. The only one, and she knows it. She claims to love me like no other, but couldn't tell me this? Why? If she has truly thought this through and is comfortable with her decision then sitting me down and telling me like an adult shouldn't have been that hard.
I find it irresponsible that she would wait months before introducing her boyfriend to her children, but a week after meeting this girl she feels comfortable describing "bi-sexual" to her 10 year old? But see I can't say this to her b/c then I'm not being supportive(according to her "friends") see I am not allowed to have my own opinion. I'm just supposed to be that "Yes Man" again.
I just don't understand why I am not allowed to be hurt? Since when does someone hurting YOUR feelings make YOU the bad guy? I guess since today....
6 comments:
i plan on leaving a comment later once i've had time to collect my thoughts...
I have not read the MS blog announcment from Misty. I have had a chance to read both your's & her's FB comments and this blog. B/C I have not read the MS blog I dont know all the details, so please excuse me it I speak out of turn or step on anyones toes.
I have known Angel for 20 years. I have never known her to be judgmental or racist. Opinionated, HELL YES! But that's what I love about you most, Angel. You have always known who you are and what you like, want or do not want. You always have this gift of making someone stop and really think about things in a whole nother perspective.
I do no know Misty on a personal level. I used to keep up with her myspace blogs, but I quit reading about a year ago or so. I have to admit, I was tired of all the umm, well I dont know what to call it. DRAMA. It just seemed like she fell in love with every guy that looked at her and was constantly going through moods, sometimes several moods in one blog. One minute she would swear off boys and be miss independant, the next she would talk about who she wanted to date next and constantly moving. I got the impression that Misty doesnt really know who or what she is or wants.
Ok, enuff bout that, I want to say that I agree with you Angel, If she truly feels and knows that she is Bi, I cant belive she didnt talk to you about that b4 announcing it to the whole world. It almost seems like she just decided to be bi. I dont know, every one that I have know that has been either gay or bi has always known it their whole life. Again, I have not read her announcement so I dont know how long she has felt this way. But after reading what you wrote to her, it sounds like she's only known this girl for a week. A WEEK, 7 days. And she's already introducing her to her kids. WOW. So what happens next week when things go sour and she decides that she isnt bi any more or has a different girl friend. You cant just bring (strangers) in and out of your kids lives. Man or woman. It just isnt safe and it doesnt set a good example.
I guess what I want to say here is, Misty, you have a wonderful, loving, caring, trustworthy, dependable, incredibly great sister who loves you unconditionally no matter what. And you have hurt her by not confiding in her first. No that doesnt mean you have to run to her about everything. But come on, that was an awfully BIG announcement. I dont think anyone saw that coming. Angel only wants the best for you and the girls. She just doesnt want to see you get hurt.
this is all i will say about this on here.
1. my kids haven't met her.
2. you don't know me AT ALL or our relationship OR the whole situation. maybe before you comment on a situation you should know the whole story.
3. i've apologized to her for HOW she found out. and the only reason she got attacked was cause she attacked me in her comment and said things that had NOTHING to do with the situation.
4. don't comment on me or my life or how you perceive me and my drama. not everybody can know who they are or what they want. and trust me...it sucks more for that person than anybody else.
5. she loves me like no other and the same is true for me about her. other than my kids she is the ONLY person i care about hurting or disapointing. i do so much to make her happy and proud of me. NOBODY even knows how much i'm trying to be normal. and how angel's opinion is the one that matters and how i could not live my life without her. s
I'm sorry you were hurt friend. I also have a dramatic family, and I just try to stay away from it. My relationship with my brother is hit or miss. Sometimes we talk every few weeks, other times we don't talk for a year. I don't have the right words to take away the hurt, but know that I am here if you need to talk! Love you!
Everyone always has those trying times in there lives... I wish you BOTH the best of luck and happiness. I know sometimes the best thing to do is write whats bothering you down and sometimes we just want people to acknowledge that they understand. We may not know the situation, and honestly... I have no right to say anything one way or the other. I know by the time I actually post this comment everything will be blown over. One day you guys may laugh about this. Life is too short to be angry at your best friend :)
To misty - Just like you don't like the above person saying stuff about you because they don't know you - you should defend your sister against these people because they probably don't know her. Just because she said something that may have upset you/them does not give them the right to attack her. She is your sister and you should stand by her, even if you are mad at her.
Angel,
I completely understand what you are saying in the 5th paragraph. I am the same person to my sister Victoria that you are to Misty. She recently jumped all over me because I wasn't being "supportive" of her wanting to marry a felon that just got out of jail in April and she had only known for a month and she called ME selfish. It will blow over and you still will always love her and she will always love you. I'm here for you.
Post a Comment